Sunday, August 17, 2008
EMPATHY books & movies
What books and movies would you recommend to someone strong (or weak) in Empathy?
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Donald Clifton, Ph.D. 1924-2003
Father of Strengths Psychology and Grandfather of Positive Psychology
Peter F. Drucker, 1909 -2005
"The idea that there are "well-rounded" people, people who have only strengths and no weaknesses ... is a prescription for mediocrity if not incompetence. Strong people always have strong weaknesses. ... And no one is strong in many areas."
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Peter F. Drucker Quote:
"People-decisions are time-consuming, for the simple reason that the Good Lord did not create people as "resources" for organizations. They do not come in proper size and shape for the tasks that have to be done in organization - and they cannot be machined down or re-cast for these tasks. People are always "almost fits" at best. To get the work done with people (...) therefore requires lots of time, thought and judgement."
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Empathy is unfortunately on the lower end of my talent spectrum. I realize this when I am in negotiations or interviews, and my colleagues would say "did you perceive how his head flushed red when you asked him this question?". Most often, I haven't perceived anything.
When I read David J. Lieberman's "You Can Read Anyone - Never be Fooled, Lied to, or Taken Advantage of Again", it dawned on me how powerful Empathy can be even in the tough business world. Empathy being a weakness of me, there is no book that would turn it into a Strength, but it helped me appreciate a lot the talent of Empathy, and I imagine that this book might be very interesting for people strong in Empathy!
Para mim o filme Path Adams: O amor é contagioso, mostra muito da empatia entre pessoas e a dificuldade por parte de outras pessoas em entender o outro. Dr. Path Adams (Rob Willians) é um estudante de medicina que foge dos tradicionais métodos de atendimentos médicos. Ele é uma pessoa extremamente empatica, que se coloca no lugar dos doentes e percebe, que mais do que atendimento médico, uma pessoa doente necessita de amor, de atencao, alem de que cada pessoa deve ser tratada como um ser único e nao haver um comportamento padrao, como a maioria dos médicos costuma fazer. Cada qual, com sua necessidade. Com isso, ele consegue mostrar a outros estudantes que seu método é válido e faz com que estes aprovem sua metodologia e passem a entender o lado emocional de um doente....Acho que vale a pena ver este filme e considerar os aspectos comportamentais que aparecem . Podemos perceber que as pessoas tem diferentes talento, acarretando assim, dificuldades de entendimento sobre os divergentes tipos de comportamento, o que muitas vezes provoca atitudes que vemos como "negativas", quando deveríamos analisar quais os talentos que aquela pessoa possui...para entender seus comportamentos.
While I was a bit disappointed with Daniel Goleman's classic "Emotional Intelligence" for lack of practical examples, his book "Primal Leadership" (with the co-authors Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee) offers much more practical advise. I am not sure whether I agree with the author's premise that emotional intelligence can be substantially improved by anyone, let alone become a strength. I believe it has a lot to do with talents, such as Empathy, Harmony and Positivity. For this reason, I strongly recommend it to people with these talents.
I quote the book: "Our analysis suggest that, overall, the climate - how people feel about working at a company - can account for 20 to 30 percent of business performance".
"In general, the more emotionally demanding the work, the more empathetic and supportive the leader needs to be. Leaders drive the service climate and thus the predisposition of employees to satisfy customers."
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